What a morning.. I got out a lot of built up anger.. Nothing good came of it but at least I don’t have those feeling and thoughts weighting me down.
I also was able to finally ask a question that I’ve been trying to find away of asking.. I didn’t get a direct answer.. But I did get a feel for what’s going on.
I am starting to feel like I’m ready to make a choice. I was worried about this & that.. But I’m starting to see that my biggest flaws is caring too much & factoring in people that I really don’t matter to.
I really need to shape up & start actively participating in my life.. Instead waiting on something to happen or waiting on someone to have some type of feeling for me.
I also just want to be alone.. Like really and truly alone.. I’m over mindless & emotionless relationships & people.
Why is when you miss some one you miss everything about them.. & block out why he’s gone enough for you to miss him.. I fucked up.. I should have kept moving.. I forgot about this uncomfortable feeling the stress & worry that sick to my tummy feeling..
Im facing the same feelings and stresses it makes it next to impossible to enjoy anything in front or around me.